With or Without You
by eatsyourface
Summary: Things still aren't great between Fighter and Healer. Seiya tries to deal with it. But how? In the end, what will come from this?


**Disclaimer:** The Three Lights, the Sailor Starlights, all other Sailor Soldiers mentioned (unless otherwise stated) and Sailor Moon are created and copyrighted by Takeuchi Naoko and owned by Kodansha publishing and TOEI Animation, Inc. This is a fanfiction meant to entertain, but not meant to make a profit. This story is © 2002 by me, Seito no Senshi (Seishi Kou).  
'With or Without You' is written, sung and copyrighted by U2. I do not claim ownership of this song.  
  
Original song used was meant to be 'Outside of Me' by Killing Heidi.  
  
^^;; Thanks Mad Hattress for helping me understand the lyrics.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
**_With or Without You_  
  
See the stone set in your eyes  
See the thorn twist in your side  
I wait for you**  
  
Seiya stood silently at the balcony, staring at the sky as if it would save her from the pain that she was going through. She hated herself for allowing to this happen, and she hated herself even more for letting Her know how she felt. Because even though Yaten never said anything… She didn't have to. It was enough, just watching her go through her everyday tasks.  
Her sweet angel that was not hers, Seiya herself had put through this agonizing torture. Being an empath meant that a person would be able to sense the thoughts of others. That person would forever more carry the burden of a thousand people and more, on her shoulders, feeling their pain.  
And now, Seiya had added to that. Because she was hurting, Yaten was hurting, because Yaten was the cause of all this.  
  
**Slight of hand and twist of fate  
On a bed of nails she makes me wait  
And I wait.... without you**  
  
Try as she might, she could not forget her. She had said Good-bye to that love, but it would not go. It just would not leave. Yes, for a short, sweet time, it had been blissful; she had been free of that. But now for some stupid reason it had returned and Seiya was hurting more then ever.  
So now, she stood here every day, hoping, that, perhaps, her love would come to her, kiss her and hold her. The memory of her sweet lips remained in her mind, sweet scent, soft touch, that had been but a brief second.  
I will wait for you, no matter what…  
  
**With or without you  
With or without you…**  
  
I can't live… with or with out you…  
Sad eyes never blinking, unshed tears never straying.  
  
**Through the storm we reach the shore  
You give it all but I want more  
And I'm waiting for you**  
  
This usually never happened. They would have an argument, but it would get better two hours after that. They'd joke again, teasing each other.  
This time… so different… An interesting dilemma that one could not solve.  
I would give you everything of me and more, just say the words. Seiya clenched her fist tightly when she recalled the words of Yaten.  
_'You realize… that I could never love you this way?'_ If I could stop this, and still have your love- but it's impossible.  
  
**With or without you  
With or without you  
I can't live with or without you**  
  
I am going to cry for you. And I will never stop letting the tears flow.  
A hand rested itself on a beating heart, as the other touched a pale cheek gently.  
You're a liar. You said that you would- You are a **liar.**  
Trembling lips smiled, as a tear rolled down her face. Foolish, to dwell on something.  
Can't you see?! Can't you see that… if you hurt then so do I?! What have you done to me?!  
  
**And you give yourself away  
And you give yourself away  
And you give  
And you give  
And you give yourself away**  
  
_"… Penny for your thoughts?" murmured Taiki, quoting the Earthian… Quote. Seiya's head jerked up. It seemed that she as not as adept as hiding her emotions say… when… she had fallen for Kakyuu-sama.  
"… No." She turned her attention back to her guitar, deliberately ignoring the taller Starlight- but that wasn't working.  
"You are the biggest pig-head to ever hit the Kinmoku!" That sounded rather strange coming from her mouth, and it took several minutes for what Taiki said to register in Seiya's mind. Finally…  
"Gomen. Delayed reaction." Taiki rolled her eyes.  
"Seiya, try to control your emotions. You're a walking time-bomb." Seiya glared at her.  
"What the hell does that mean?!" she demanded, hands still. Taiki sighed.  
"It's fairly obviously what's going on in your head. Either let it out, or hold it in. But if you do the latter, do a good job of it because the consequences of what will happen won't be good, if it slips out."  
"Hn."  
"… You told her, didn't you."  
"Hn." Taiki sighed.  
"Keeping things hidden from Kakyuu is literally impossible. She knows us so well. And Yaten was bound to find out sooner or later…"  
"I'm tr- I won't be so obvious about it all…!!"_  
  
**My hands are tied  
My body's bruised  
She's got me with nothing left to win  
And nothing left to lose**  
  
Thinking now, Seiya knew, that she was like the Cold Seiya. The Seiya that had woken up from the unnecessarily long coma, eyes never glancing the way of Her. No feeling whatsoever, all bottled up inside of her. However… one gentle nudge was all it needed to send it spiraling out of control.  
She had hoped, that, perhaps they could talk, and understand each other. She wanted to run her hands through Yaten's soft silky hair and touch her skin. Blerk. Stop… thinking these thoughts. Dwelling on this would not do her good.  
It **hadn't** done her any good; inside was **not** a great place to be at the moment. Imagine a bright, sunny room…   
Then take up an axe and **destroy** the place. **Crack** the walls, **shatter** the windows, and **kick down** the doors for all the **pain** and **sorrow** to **invade**. Here rules **grief** and **hurt**.  
Seiya scowled.  
How stupid of her! She had had everything to gain, and nothing to lose.  
How painfully stupid of her.  
  
**With or without you  
With or without you  
I can't live with or without you**  
  
"Sit down, please." There was a moment's hesitation, before her request was granted. Yaten sat down in front of her, so close, that their knees were almost touching.  
Seiya did not say anything, just stared at the angel before her. If she wanted to talk, then she would. Nobody would force her.  
A pale hand reached out, gently brushing their fingers across her lips, tracing a gentle path on her face.  
"Will you smile for me?" Seiya's mouth opened to say something, but Yaten pressed her fingers against her lips, shaking her head.  
"If you can be happy for me…" Seiya's eyes flickered, and gently she pulled Yaten's hand away from her.  
"What am I to you? 'Not a lover, but more then a friend?'" They couldn't think of anybody else who could fit that other then Kakyuu-sama herself. She was more then just their Princess, their friend/companion, but the Prince was her lover. If it did not sound so strange, she was more then just that to them. Nobody else…  
"Don't say that." But Yaten leant back on the couch, entwining her fingers with Seiya.  
  
"But if you smile for me…"  
"I will do more then smile."  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
**Final notes:** It's strange, since I don't quite understand the ending to what I wrote. Did they get together, or not? I am hoping, that by writing this ending, you could think: "Ok. Now they are going to kiss" **or** "Things are a bit better." It's your decision. I had two endings, because I wanted them to get together, but at the same time, I didn't. It's your decision about what happens here; friends, or does something grow.  
_They were 'more then friends, but not quite lovers'._ I'm not sure how you would take it, but that's your problem.  
Maybe Seiya and Yaten grew closer from this. Maybe not. One thing is for sure- I don't have the skill to make things work without demolishing the whole place. Don't worry. I'm thinking of setting up a Seiya/Yaten school for people. Cost of admission will be discussed soon enough.  
  
Yaten: *warning look* Don't even think about it... it's bad enough them English Starlights are together! Soon the Chinese ones will be "one"! Then the Norwegians! Before you know it, the whole world will be Seiya and... me!!!  
Seishi: *throws brick at her* Get over it. You were meant to be. And technically, the Chinese are with me on this. XD  
Yaten: ¬.¬ Self-contradictor. *shuffles off knowing she can't win because Seishi is Chinese and there's nothing to do about it unless she goes back in time with Trunks' time- gets an idea*  



End file.
